Comfortably Numb

Oh man.... I'm hoping.

Tomorrow I am scheduled to have my gallbladder removal surgery promptly at 12:40pm. It's a laparoscopic dealio that is done routinely and requires no overnight stay. My surgeon is highly qualified.... maybe over qualified. She is skilled not only in the art of removing body parts but in the transplanting of them as well. I'm in really, really good hands.

So what's the worry?

Let me count thy ways:

1) When I was in labor with Ava it took not one, not two, but three epidurals to numb me up.......partially.

2)When I was in labor with Ruby the epidural never took. I felt every contraction, every tear, and well everything when pushing that FACE UP baby out. YeeeOuch.

3) I had a root canal last month. Due to previous experiences above I opted for the gas and given seven Novocaine shots to numb me up real good. You guessed it..... it wore out within 10 minutes into the 1.5 hr painful procedure.

4) Last Monday, when in the E.R.. I was given morphine and in a mere 20 minutes I was doubling over again with intense pain.

I am a medical mystery, so I've been told......a medical mystery that happens to metabolize pain/numbing medicines in lightning speed.

When I was talking to the nurse during my preoperative evaluation about my problem he proceeded to tell me about the time when he woke up during his own surgery.He said he didn't feel any pain because the surgeons put localize pain medicines in the areas that they are working on in the event that someone does wake up. He was quickly put to back to sleep and the surgery went on without another hitch.He then stated that people would be surprised how often patients wake up when undergoing surgery and told me not to worry. I felt a little better when I left the appointment.

It wasn't until I got home that I realized that story doesn't help me out one bit, in fact, it made my fears worsen.

You see, due to my high tolerance of pain medication, in the event that I should, er.. ..when I wake up, you better believe I'm gonna feel it. Those localized pain meds don't stand a chance with this metabolizing machine wonder body of mine.

"And you body. Why of all things to metabolize fast you choose pain medicines? Seriously? How about metabolizing fat fast, you know, something useful? Once again you disappoint me."

I'm a-so scared!